Learn To Trust Again To Experience A Meaningful Life

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Learning to trust again can be hard, but if you do, your life will be more joyful.

Our ability to be open and vulnerable is one of our greatest gifts. Being vulnerable often requires risk. However, building walls to protect ourselves removes much of the opportunity for a rich and fulfilling life.

A meaningful life requires letting go of the need to control everything. How can you do this? The key is to let go of the idea that you have something to lose.

What fears do you have that limit your willingness to connect?

  • Fear of abandonment?
  • Fear of failure?
  • Fear of rejection?
  • Fear of making the wrong choice?

Understanding your fears will help you to identify the source of your trust issues so you can work through them and move forward.

Using these strategies will help you learn to trust again:

  1. Realize that it’s not always about you. It’s natural to feel slighted and mistreated. You might even feel that you’ve failed in some way. Everyone has issues that negatively affect the way they interact with others. Perhaps the other person is struggling. Avoid overreacting and taking it personally.
  1. Start small. Take new relationships slowly and trust a little at a time. Give a little trust and then allow the other person to earn more trust over time. Take care of yourself, but be reasonable. Seek improvement rather than perfection.
  2. Learn to trust yourself. We’re often too quick to remember our mistakes and to forget the great decisions we’ve made in the past. Remember the numerous times you’ve trusted others and been right. Trust yourself to make good decisions.
  3. Be trustworthy. The least trusting people are often the least trustworthy. We expect others to behave in a similar fashion to ourselves. Be someone worthy of trust and you’ll find it easier to trust others. Be the type of partner, friend, coworker, or family member that you’d like to have in your life.
  4. Expect to have your trust violated. People are highly variable. Even a single person can exhibit a wide variety of moods and attitudes. Everyone close to you will hurt you at some point. To expect anything else would be naïve.
  • Remember the times that you’ve hurt others. Focus on the fact that you’re a good person and probably didn’t mean to cause any pain. The sources of your mistrust were probably of a similar nature. Be willing to forgive and expect forgiveness from others.
  1. Learn from the past. Was it possible to foresee or prevent any past transgressions against you? Did you trust too quickly? Did you ignore any obvious warning signs? Were you too impulsive? What can you learn and apply to the future?

     

  2. Learn to let go. If you focus on your fears and the negative parts of your past relationships, it will be extremely difficult to have healthy relationships in the future. The past is over. Learn from it and look forward. Avoid allowing regret to taint your present and future.
  3. Enhance your communication skills. Failed expectations lead to feelings of mistrust. Ensure that you’re communicating your needs and expectations clearly. It’s not fair to expect others to read your mind. Avoid making people guess about what’s important to you. Tell them!

All relationships have rough patches from time to time. Relationships with your romantic partner, friends, coworkers, and family members are all susceptible to feelings of mistrust. Many of your acquaintances may let you down. The ability to learn, move on, and trust again is invaluable. Be brave and move forward toward a brighter future.

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All content on this ​website was created and/or compiled by ​Natural Stress Relief Women. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material (including text and images) without express and written permission from this ​site’s author/owner is strictly prohibited.

8 Remarkable Strategies To Never Have a Bad Day Again!

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 Do you want to know how to never have a bad day again?Read on to find out how!

All of us are faced with good days and bad days. Just imagine for a second what it would be like if you could eliminate most of the bad days from your life? Sounds impossible right?  I thought so too, until I realized that I DO have the ability to turn each bad day into a good one and make bad days a thing of the past.

What actually makes a good day may differ from person to person. For me a good day is waking up to enjoy the birds chirping or the flowers outside my window, working hard at something I enjoy during the day, and being able to connect in a meaningful way with close family and friends, and maybe even a stranger, before the end of the day.

What would make a “good day”for you? What has to happen for you to label a day as “good”?  Depending on your answer, you may be able to make each day you’re alive a good day. It’s up to you.

I uses these 8 strategies to eliminate bad days from my week and you can do the same too:

  1. I refuse to have a bad day. There is ample opportunity to have a bad day. You don’t have to work oat it, and you don’t have to look for it.  Isn’t it funny how it just seems to “find” you? You might be running late or your car decides to break down. Someone might speak unkindly to you or you spill mustard on your pants.  Things just seem to happen at the worse possible time, and completely ruins your day…IF you let it. So don’t let it! For me, having a bad day can be a lot like eating a piece of my mom’s delicious apple pie I know I should ignore. Just because it’s there doesn’t mean I have to bite. Avoid letting a few minor mishaps ruin your day.
  1. I choose to be happy, or at least content. In spite of whatever is going wrong, I choose to be happy. Sometime a bad day can get really ugly, so one those super bad days when I can’t find any happiness, I try my best to at least be content. Fact is, you can choose to have a good day or a bad day. The secret is to release your expectations and try to see what’s good in each situation.  As hard as it may seem at the time, there is always some good in each situation. 
  2. I spend time with loved ones. There are few activities that are as effective in bringing back perspective to reality than spending time with a loved one. The stress, worry, and anxiety just seems to melt away. And “loved ones” can include your four-legged family friends and family members as well ( read: pets)! 
     
  3. I always try to be on time. I don’t know about you, but running late and being late creates stress for me. For me, the stress begins once I realize that I’m going to be late and it continues throughout the day. It rarely ends until the day is over. If you’re late for one activity, you can be late for everything afterwards, too. Give yourself plenty of time to keep your schedule intact and you’ll avoid the stress of a bad day. Click here for a great resource if the lack of time makes you feel stressed.
     
  4. I have a morning routine. If your morning starts well, you’ll find the rest of your day goes well. A morning routine is an effective way to get the day off to a positive start.  My morning starts at 5:45  am each day and I go through the same ( or similar) routine every morning: a glass of water upon rising,  a 20 minute walk, 15 minutes bible reading, a bowl of oats with raisins for breakfast, a bowl of fruit ( or something else healthy) for a mid morning snack, and I am out the door by by 8 Am for work.  Important note: I usually prepare my work clothes the night before.  Consider using this fabulous tool if you are a busy woman who needs to save time and look great for work each day. And click here to learn how to get your day off to a good start in 20 minutes flat!
  • An effective routine can include what time you wake up, a review of your to-do list, wearing the clothes you laid out the night before, affirmations, exercise, and anything else you enjoy in the morning. Build your routine slowly and ensure it enhances your day.  Once your routine become a habit, you will be amazed at how it enhances you day.  I have an “end of day” routine as well…but I’ll share that in another blog post.  :-)
     
  1. I realize that LESS is MORE, so I try doing less. Having too much to do each day can be overwhelming.  Being overcommitted can easily create many challenges that get in the way of having a good day. Reduce your schedule to the most important 3-5 tasks. Stick to the important and urgent tasks. Reschedule the rest. Be balanced with the amount of tasks and responsibilities you take on each day to avoid burn-out and bad days.
     
  2. I have learned to complete my most important tasks FIRST. There are few things more frustrating than a stressful day that accomplishes little. Give yourself the gift of knowing that you completed at least one important task. That’s more than most can claim. Complete it as early in the day as possible and give yourself time to accomplish even more.
     
  3. I am grateful for the blessings of each day, no matter how small. When life is wearing you down, remember all the great things in your life. Give yourself a few minutes to list all the positive people and circumstances in your life. Are you healthy? Do you have friends and family? Your life is probably much better than you think!Start a gratitude journal and consider listing at least 3 things that fill you with gratitude as part of your morning routine. Your attitude will be primed to have a good day.

Having a good day is relative. The worst day for a middle-class American might be a great day for a child in a third-world country. Only you can assign a quality label to your day. Make the conscious decision to have a great day.

Now it’s Your Turn

Used the comment box below to share with us:

1. What 3 things are you most grateful for?

2. What 3 strategies above could you use to eliminate bad days from your life?

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All content on this ​website was created and/or compiled by ​Natural Stress Relief Women. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material (including text and images) without express and written permission from this ​site’s author/owner is strictly prohibited.

How to Deal with Difficult People to Your Benefit

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Yes, you may have difficult people in your life, but you can learn something from them. Let me tell you how to deal with difficult people in your life to your benefit.

Unless you are a hermit who lives under a rock, you are bound to deal with at least a few people regularly.  You know…the colleague at work, the neighbor, or the sister-in-law who knows how to push your buttons. before your pressure starts to raise just thinking about them, here’s some good news: you can learn a lot from the difficult people in your life.

Challenging situations present opportunities for learning and growth. Rather than let the difficult people in your life frustrate or irritate you, have you ever considered using a strategy that would allow you to make optimal use of the difficult people in your life to YOUR benefit?

Just think about it for a minute. What if that colleague, neighbor, or sister-in-law  you enjoyed being around the least actually enhanced your life? How powerful would that be? There are ways to make the best of the situation.  Read on to discover how to deal with difficult people in your life to your benefit.  It’s easier than you think!

Here are 8 wonderful ways you benefit from dealing with the difficult people in your life each day:

  1. You learn patience. Whenever you’re stuck dealing with that colleague, neighbor, or sister-in law  you’d rather avoid, use the opportunity to practice being patient. It may be difficult at first, but it will get easier with time as you develop the wonderful quality of patience.
  2. You learn to manage your emotions. You may find that your mood and emotions take a turn for the worse when dealing with the difficult people in your life. Guess what? You can turn that around and use that as an opportunity to work on maintaining your composure in a stressful situation. Take advantage of your enemy’s presence and use it to fuel your skills. That’s the ultimate in self control, inner-strength and personal power.
     
  3. You learn about yourself. Take a moment to ask yourself: why does this particular person drive me crazy? In many cases, you’ll find that the people you dislike possess characteristics that you also have. Think about those whom you like the least and see if you can learn something about yourself.  In my case, there is one person that does not seem to like me very much, and the feeling is certainly mutual from my end.  I found out through a mutual friend that she is the only girl with 5 brothers and is accustomed of being the center of attention, and likes to be in control. Turns out that in my immediate family I am an important source of control and decision making ( second only to me Dad), so I am not about to let her impose her thoughts, opinions, decision’s on me.  Knowing why she gets under my skin, helps me understand both her and myself better, and helps me keep the peace.
  4. You gain an enhanced ability to focus. One effective way to be patient and manage your emotions is to focus on a resolution to the issue. If your thoughts stay centered on solving the challenge of the situation, your emotions can’t get the best of you.  So I try to focus on saying something positive or cordial, or overlooking or disregarding something unthoughtful that she may say, rather than fighting fire with fire.  I plan in advance to be calm and cordial when dealing with difficult people, come what may, so I go into the situation with that focus and objective in mind.  Often we need to push ourselves past our comfort zones to find the beauty that lies on the other side.
     
  5. You learn and practice relaxation techniques. There’s no better time to practice relaxation techniques than when you’re under the gun with someone. Bringing your stress down just a notch or two has many benefits. It’s good for your health and for the situation.  Rather than adding fuel to the fire, breath in slowly and then breathe out, count to ten ( or maybe to 20) and bring your stress and irritation down a notch.  
     
  6. You learn how to influence others. It’s not very challenging to influence your friends. However, can you influence an enemy? That’s the ultimate test of your people-skills. Try every tactic you know to bring the other person to your side. Sometimes something as simple as a smile can do the trick to breakdown barriers and open the way for a calm and cordial interaction with a difficult person. You’ll be amazed that with practice and patience, your abilities will quickly improve.  Even when you experience a setback in dealing with the difficult prople in youe life, remember that setbacks are an opportunity to grow.
  1. You learn how to let go. Do you allow a negative interaction to ruin your day or even your week? Suffering longer than necessary is just plain silly. Learn to how to let things go and enjoy the rest of your day. The interaction can only continue to haunt you if you allow it. Turn your attention back to the present.

     

  2. You learn to be compassionate and forgiving.  Unfortunately, unknown to you,  difficult people have painful reasons that explain their behavior. You just never know what is going on in someone’s life that triggers a negative behavior toward you ( and others).  They might be going through ( or has gone through)  a devastating divorce, a death in the family, physical and emotional abuse, or serious health or financial challenges. As difficult as it may sometimes be, you do need to avoid taking the words and behavior of others personally. Even the kindest of people have a bad day or even a bad decade. Learn to forgive others.

It took me years to come to this conclusion, but I have come to realize that the people that challenge our thoughts and emotions are a gift.  The million dollar question is: are you using the difficult people in your life to your benefit?  Are you allowing your interaction with them to open up new avenues and opportunities for your own personal growth.  Are you using every occasion you interact with them as a wonderful opportunity to enhance your own life?

If you’re not using these challenging people and situations to your benefit, you’re ignoring an excellent opportunity for personal growth. Use this empowering thought for the day and tell yourself that you are ready for whatever ( or whoever) you meet today. Learn from the difficult people in your life. The skills you develop will  enrich your life and make YOU a better person.

Please share your thoughts with us!  Use the comment box below:

1. Who is the #1 most difficult person you have to deal with regularly?

2. Which of the 8 strategies above can you use to deal with that difficult person to YOUR benefit?

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All content on this ​website was created and/or compiled by ​Natural Stress Relief Women. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material (including text and images) without express and written permission from this ​site’s author/owner is strictly prohibited.

Top Ten Reasons Personal Development Affiliate Programs Rock!

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Make money the innovative way…through an affiliate program!

Affiliate marketing is a great way to make money—especially if you’re a self-motivated individual, who loves working online, using the internet and reaching out to people in a meaningful way. Many people look at affiliate marketing just as a way to make money, when in reality, it’s also a great way to help people. Here are the top ten reasons personal development affiliate programs are the best!

  1. Inexpensive to start. Sure, you’ve got to spend money to make money. But you don’t have to spend all your money to make money. Unlike other money-making endeavors, affiliate marketing has very limited start-up costs. Often, it’s completely free to get started (and then remains free throughout the duration of the program). Unlike franchising opportunities, you don’t have to empty your bank accounts just to start your personal development affiliate program.
  1. You get to choose which products you think will help people. One of the biggest benefits of affiliate marketing is only being required to market products that you really believe in. This means that you can find a way to send more customers to the personal development products that you really love.
  1. You get to help people with your very own business. Lots of people want to own their own businesses. Many more people want to do something with their lives that helps people. An affiliate program that markets personal development allows you to do both of those things. You get to run your own business and you get to help people. It’s the best of both worlds.
  1. You can help people in your spare time. While it’s best to treat affiliate marketing as a job, it doesn’t mean you have to quit your current job. If you’re looking for a way that allows you to help people, without forcing you to give up your job (and also brings in its own money), personal development affiliate programs are the way to go.
  1. There’s a ready and waiting audience. The world has always been wide and confusing. With the proliferation of the internet, the world may feel smaller, but it’s still confusing. Figuring out what you want to do, making goals, and actually reaching those goals is not always an easy task. There are millions of searches every day about how to figure out what to do with your life, how to manage stress, how to set goals, and how to reach them. The audience is there, and your program can help that audience find their answers.
  1. Start making money fast. Because there is such a large audience just waiting for the right affiliate product for them, you can start making money quickly. Many entrepreneurs see their businesses fail in just a few months, before they have even really gotten the opportunity to get off the ground. It takes much less time to start making money with this kind of program than it does with brick and mortor businesses.
  1. It’s actually ethical. One of the biggest concerns that people have while looking for a way to make money online is that many of the programs or techniques do not seem ethical or only allow you to make money if you bring a bunch more people into the program (pyramid scheme, anyone?), but affiliate marketing is different. Personal development affiliate marketing is completely ethical and it’s by far one of the best ways to help others. Sure, it’s a business, but it’s a business marketing products and services that really help people improve their lives.
  1. You’re not the merchant, just the marketer. Why is this a good thing? Because the most expensive parts of starting your own business are usually creating your product, testing it, getting it manufactured, and then setting up a merchant account and website to sell that product. And then you have to pay for marketing on top of all of those costs. Instead of paying all those expenses, you are the one getting paid, and because you get to choose what products you work with, you can stick to your desire to help people through personal development.
  1. Your business represents your beliefs. There are plenty of theories in the field of personal development. When you work as an affiliate, you don’t have to adopt the beliefs of a parent company. Being an affiliate, especially in the field of personal development, means you get to talk about the concepts and ideas that you want to talk about.

     

  2. It helps you achieve your own personal development goals. Whether you need funds to start another business or just want to have more financial freedom, a personal development affiliate program is a great way to help you reach your goals, whatever those goals may be.

Please Share Your Thoughts 

In the comments below, share with us:

1. Have you worked with an affiliate program?
2. If so, what did you like best about it?

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All content on this ​website was created and/or compiled by ​Natural Stress Relief Women. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material (including text and images) without express and written permission from this ​site’s author/owner is strictly prohibited.

 

8 Financial Questions To Ask Before Marriage

Money problems is a leading cause of divorce. So before you say “I Do” examine these 8 financial questions to ask before marriage.

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Sending out invitation and registering for gifts at your favorite store is only one step of getting ready for marriage.

What about checking your financial compatibility?

I know that does not sound very romantic, but thinking about financial questions to ask before marriage and having discussions about finances are an essential part of preparing for life with your future husband.

Since financial problems in known to be a major cause of divorce, it crucial to talk about money early in the relationship to avoid future issues during married life. 

Kansas State University conducted a study, “Examining the Relationship Between Financial Issues and Divorce,”  that confirms the relationship between money challenges and divorce rates. The study found that couples who struggled with money in the beginning of their relationship were more likely to get divorced.

Don’t become part of the divorce statistics.   Here are 8 financial questions to ask your partner before you get married.

  1. How will finances be combined?  You need to know if your accounts with your future hubby will be combined or whether you will keep them separateDecide now as a couple how you will handle your finances after marriage.  Most couple decide to combine the accounts or preferably to open new joint ones as newly weds.
  1. Who will pay the bills each month?  This is another important decision that needs to be discussed before you say “I Do”. It’s usually best ( and easier)  to choose one person to handle bill payments in order to avoid confusion.  Deciding now who will handle bill payments each month also  clarifies the areas of responsibility in the relationship. In addition to handling monthly bill payments, the same person usually handles tax preparation as well.
  1. What is your debt? Questions about debt may be sensitive, but vitally important healthy financial relationship. Your future husband may have different kinds of debts from from student loans to credit cards. Understanding how much debt each person has before marriage will affect future decisions.  You may want to buy a house immediately after the wedding, only to find out that your new husbands debt bars you from getting a mortgage. What if you ant to upgrade your living room furniture?
  1. What are all of your income sources?  While both you and your future hubby may receive a regular paycheck from your job, that may only be party of the total income picture.  To be able to plan your future accurately, you will need to know all of the income sources. Is your future spouse receiving annuity payments? Does he get royalty checks from a novel he published ten years ago? These are the kinds of financial details your partner needs to share with you before you get married. Being open about your income as a couple builds trust in a relationship and there is no better foundation to build a lasting marriage on than love AND trust!
  1. Are you considering more education? For many people student loans are one of the biggest sources of debt. Obviously, this can have an impact if you or your partner is considering more education.  How will you pay for it? According to the Consumer Financial Protection Bureau, student loan debt has reached $1.2 trillion. That’s staggering. It’s estimated the average borrower has $26,000 in student loans. Before you pursue more education, you should consider the impact on your future marriage.
  1. What role do parents play in your finances? Are your parents helping to pay your bills? Or, have the wheels turned and you are now the one helping your parents financially? These are important questions that affect a couple’s financial plans and decisions. How would you feel if your future hubby’s parents helped during a difficult financial period? It’s important to discuss these kinds of questions and set boundaries and repayment terms in advance.
  1. How do you plan to save?  When it comes to questions about saving the main focus needs to be investments and retirement.  Do you or your future husband  contribute to a retirement plan at work? Do you or your future husband have other investments? How will combining finances affect your strategy moving forward?
  1. What are your financial dreams? It’s essential that you discuss your dreams and goals with your partner before you get married. If you want to retire before 50, he needs to know since that would effect the financial decisions you make now? If he plans on changing careers, you definitely need to know.

Every couple who openly and honestly discusses these 8 financial questions with each other before marriage are better prepared for their future as husband and wife.

Please Share Your Thoughts 

In the comments below, share with us:

1. Do you believe that financial discussions are crucial prior to marriage?
2. What financial question do you think would be the most important to ask of your future spouse?

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All content on this ​website was created and/or compiled by ​Natural Stress Relief Women. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material (including text and images) without express and written permission from this ​site’s author/owner is strictly prohibited.

How to Push Yourself Beyond Your Limits

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Discomfort can be trying, but you can learn how to push yourself beyond your limits and make it work for you in a positive way.

I have learned that its crucial to push yourself beyond your comfort zone when life knocks you down.  I discovered how to make discomfort work to my advantage, even when faced with something as devastating as divorce. The first and most important step is to accept my situation, however distressing it might be.  When I accept the situation, I find the power to change it.

The truth is that true happiness depends more on your reaction to an event than on the event itself.  When I let  go of expectations and train myself to be resilient my anxiety levels drop drastically. I can then use my energy to focus on tackling the challenges with more confidence, courage and focus.

I try to stay focused on my purpose in life. For instance, when I remain focussed on why I want to complete a project, I can handle setbacks and obstacles better.

I trust in my strength. I know that I am capable of tolerating noisy neighbors or long lines at the bank. I create new strategies for coping with circumstances that may be beyond my control, rather than letting those circumstance control me.

I evaluate my self-talk. I distinguish between an inconvenience and a disaster.  There’s a huge difference, even though at times an inconvenience can seem like an insurmountable disaster.  During those tense and frustrating moments,  I encourage myself to stay calm, and use humor to dissolve tension. You can create a relaxation response during any stressful event.  Click here to learn how!

I have also learned to take baby steps that help me push myself beyond my limits. I identify the areas in my life where I tend to become irritated.  ( I was surprised to find that there are many).  Through gradual exposure I develop more effective responses. I may hang out in the break room for a few minutes each morning with a coworker I usually avoid until I discover how kind and interesting she really is. 

I think long term. Rather than dealing with stress by watching too much TV or eating half a cheesecake, I develop constructive outlets. Taking a walk or relaxing in a warm bath soothes me without any adverse consequences.

Today, I accept that inconvenience, challenges, setbacks, and delays are an inevitable part of life. I choose to remain peaceful and push myself beyond my limits to thrive and be happy…anyway.

Now its YOUR Turn. Share your answers to these self-reflection questions:

  1. How can you motivate yourself to push yourself beyond your limits and persevere through discomfort?
  2. How does discomfort contribute to your personal growth?
  3. What are 3 things you can do today to break out of your comfort zone?

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All content on this ​website was created and/or compiled by ​Natural Stress Relief Women. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material (including text and images) without express and written permission from this ​site’s author/owner is strictly prohibited.

4 Financial Habits Of The Wealthy That Can Help You Beat Money Stress

Are you struggling with money? These financial habits of the wealthy can help you get on track.

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If you want to really change your life, you are going to need to learn to prioritize.

We all have limited resources, whether those resources are time, money, or energy.  We are all limited by time and energy in a 24 hour day, and that’s why it makes sense to focus our limited resources on creating those financial habits that will have the biggest impact on our financial health and wellbeing.

Here is what we recommend to focus on when building new financial habits:

  1. Identify where are you experiencing the most stress with your finances. What causes you sleepless nights? Is it the lack of savings? A non-existent emergency fund? Living paycheck to paycheck with too little income to pay your bills each month? A bleak retirement future? A tsunami of medical bills?  For me it was figuring out how to become less dependent on a job that was becoming less and less stable and more and more toxic.  I worried about getting downsized and all the consequences that would follow while at the same time drowning in work-related stress, over-achiever stress, relationship stress and burn-out. When I finally lost my job, I worried about depleting all the funds in my emergency savings account. That’s when I decided that finding other sources of income is important and came up with solutions for my most stressing problems. You can do it too! Focusing on the most stressful financial challenge in your life can be an effective place to start.
  1. Evaluate which new financial habit would have the biggest impact on your money. Take a moment to think about the impact each potential new financial habit would bring to your life in helping you tread the path to financial freedom.
  • Write down as many potential financial habits of the wealthy as you can that are related to your target financial challenge.
  • Prioritize your list based on the likely outcome from incorporating that habit into your life. Eliminate the bottom 80%.
  • Reexamine the 20% that remain. Visualize the impact each of the remaining possibilities will have down the road 1 month, 6 months, 12 months, and 5 years down the road. How will the habit impact your life 25 years from now?
  • Select the habit that makes the most sense after carefully considering the future. If you’re torn between 2 or more habits, consider which would be the easiest to implement. Never underestimate the power of momentum. You can swing back around and pick up the other habits in the near future. In fact, when you start seeing success and positive results from your initial efforts, you will be highly motivated to continue working on other financial habits to continually improve your financial health and wellbeing. Before you know it a positive domino effect will start as you build momentum towards financial freedom.
  1. Focus on being average at first.  Rome was not built in one day, so don’t try to master everything at once. Try to bring all the parts of your personal finances up to an average level FIRST and then strive to become a high achiever. Identify the areas which are the worst aspects of your financial life because that is where the greatest source of your financial discomfort is coming from. For me, I started with paying of all credit card bills and NOT purchasing items on credit that I could not pay off in full by the end of the month.  I focused on that for about 2 years.
  • What does this mean for you?  It means that you have to work on eliminating consumer debt, building an emergency fund, trying to save at least 10% of your income every month, get adequate insurance, and be consistently saving for retirement.  Make a budget and figure out which “hidden” expenses must be included in your budget for proper planning.  You need to be doing all those things BEFORE worrying thinking about “luxury items” such as buying  a vacation home or getting  a swimming pool.
  • Monitor your progress on a 1 to 10 scale,  and try bringing each part of your finances up to a “5” before attempting anything on a grander scale.
  1. Consider whether you have what you need to put the new financial habit into place. If you don’t have what you need to get started, ask yourself : can I get what I need or start small enough that the habit is viable? If you’re 75lbs overweight and spend every evening on the couch, you’d have to start small if your desired habit was to run 10 miles each day. You’d need running shoes, too. The same principle applies when forming hew financial habits. Perhaps you need practical and simple money management advice and helpful tools and resources to help you build new financial habits.

We only have 24 hours in each day so make sure that you are using your time wisely and effectively to build new financial habits that will benefit you in the long run.  It’s a fact that the most important habits are usually the ones that are the least appealing. if you want to change your life and reduce stress when it comes to money, start by working on developing some financial habits of the wealthy to enhance your finances.

Please Share Your Thoughts 

In the comments below, share with us:

1. What habits have you adopted to help manage and improve your finances?
2. Which one of the financial habits mentioned above will you try and why?

 

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All content on this ​website was created and/or compiled by ​Natural Stress Relief Women. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material (including text and images) without express and written permission from this ​site’s author/owner is strictly prohibited.

5 Bad Financial Habits That Will Send You To The Poor House

Letting go of these 5 bad financial habits will get you on the path to financial freedom, less stress, and more peace of mind.

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Are you in debt, struggling from paycheck to paycheck, and in the back seat of your own financial car?

The bad news is that you might inadvertently be keeping yourself poor with bad financial habits.  Perhaps you don’t realize that your bad financial management habits may be  contributing to your continuing financial stress.

It’s time to examine and drop the habits that are keeping you poor.  This is the first step toward getting on the path to financial freedom. 

Make the decision to drop these 5 bad financial habits from your life:

  1. Failure to create an adequate emergency fund.  The best way to prevent financial ruin is to have an emergency fund.  Your emergency fund should covers at least 3 months of living expenses. A short period of unemployment or a single, unexpected, major bill can be financially devastating. Start by setting aside whatever small amount you can afford each month and begin creating your emergency fund today!  You can start with as little as a few dollars each week.
  1.  Stop paying bills late.  Until recently, I thought that credit card companies make most of their money from the high interest rates they charge.  I was surprised to learn that this isn’t true at all. I recently learned that it’s actually the late fees they collect that makes up their biggest source of income. Nearly every bill you pay each month becomes more expensive if you’re late, even by a single day.  So its essential that you get into the habit of sitting down once a week and paying the bills that are coming due. Don’t wait until the last minute. Pay them at least 7 days in advance and avoid late fees.
  1. Inappropriate use of credit cards.  Whenever you use a credit card to make unnecessary purchases that you really cannot afford, you are sending yourself to the poor house and exacerbating your financial stress.  The quickest way to financial disaster is to consistently make charges on your cards, often up to their limits, and then only pay the minimum due will each month.  That is a bad financial habit that puts you in a precarious financial position, lowers your credit score, and keeps you in debt for a long, long time.  If you are doing this, you are keeping yourself poor!  
  1. Making impulse purchases. How many times have you made a big unplanned purchase and then run out of money at the end of the month? Impulse purchases are rarely satisfying after the initial glow has worn off. On the contrary, you probably end up feeling frustrated and resentful of the purchase when you realize that you’ve dug yourself in a deeper financial hole. Instead, before making impulse purchases, always take a few days to think about the purchase before making a final decision. The urge to buy on impulse often subsides within 48-72 hours.

  2. Buying items you don’t need. After shelter, clothing, food, and medical care, most spending is optional to varying degrees. You probably don’t want to feel like you’re living in a cave and eating sticks, but you certainly spend money each month that could either be saved or spent more wisely.
     

Please Share Your Thoughts 

In the comments below, share with us:

1. Which habit do you think will be the easiest to eliminate?
2. Do you have any financial habits that work well for you?

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All content on this ​website was created and/or compiled by ​Natural Stress Relief Women. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material (including text and images) without express and written permission from this ​site’s author/owner is strictly prohibited.

 

Pass These Good Financial Management Habits on to Your Children!

Teach your children to adopt good financial management habits and to avoid these negative ones.

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Many parents complain that their children never listen to them.

While that may be true, there is good news.

The good news (and at the same time the bad news) is that your children are always watching.

If you ever tell your kids “Do as I say and not as I do” you know what I may.  Kids are less likely to do what you say, and MUCH more likely to do what they see you do!

The same principle applies when it comes to good financial management habits.

Your children may not listen to you, but they will quickly assimilate your habits and attitudes ( good or bad) regarding money. What habits are you demonstrating that could potentially harm their financial future?

When faced with uncertainty, it’s common to rely on experience. Before you know it, your kids  will be all grown up and may be off to college.  When they are confronted with financial situations, they’re going to imitate and mimic what they know. It’s up to you to set an example that will enhance their financial future.

Most likely, you have not given much thought to what you may be inadvertently teaching your kids about money. Today is a wonderful day to start.

4 Bad Financial habits you may be displaying that could make life more challenging for your kids:

  1.  You use your credit cards unwisely. In my opinion, this is the most devastating financial habit you may be inadvertently teaching your kids. True, credit cards can serve a purpose when you are in a financial jam, but the use of credit to purchase unnecessary items is one of the leading causes of financial stress and bankruptcy.  Don’t pass that negative financial habit on to your kids.
  2. You give in to impulse purchases. Children are already inherently spontaneous and impulsive.  That comes with being a kid.  Don’t let them witness a lack a financial control in you when it comes to money management. Your lack of control in spending money makes self-control even more elusive for your child in the future. Show your children that purchases should be decided ahead of a shopping trip….starting as early as when you sit down to plan your expenses to include in your budget. 
  3. You never stick to your budget.  Having a budget is a good start, but if you never stick to it, you are teaching your children bad financial habits. Sticking to your budget is another important way that you teach your kids financial self-control.  Involve your children in the budgeting process, and then remind them that a budget exists and that certain purchases can’t be made because of the budget. 
  4. You never make a clear distinction between wants and needs.  Teach your kids that needs are to be taken care of first. Wants are only considered after the critical items have been addressed.  Learning and understanding the difference between wants and needs is a valuable lesson your children need to grasp early on in their development.

Ask yourself if you are inadvertently displaying those 4 bad financial habits to your children. Remember: they may not listen to you, but they are always watching you!

While you make an effort to minimize or avoid showing your kids bad habits, make a point to develop and display good financial management habits.  These are the kinds of positive financial habits that can benefit you now while at the same time help your help your children to develop good habits from watching and imitating your good example.

Start displaying and sharing these 4 good financial management habits:

  1. Start saving consistently. Make this a main teaching point by saving money from each paycheck. Encourage your child to do the same with a portion of any money they earn or receive as a gift.  I give my 12-year old adopted niece chores and assignments to do and she can earn income when she completes them.  We then go to the bank together and she gets the “honor” of depositing the earnings to her savings account.  She gets excited each time she makes a deposit and sees her savings grow.  She is learning how to work and save money toward her financial goals. I also show her my savings and how I too am saving toward my financial goals. You can do the same thing with you kids. A robust savings account is an effective solution to many of life’s financial challenges.  It’s one of the valuable lessons you need to teach your kids from a young age.
  2. Start Paying bills on time. Your children know that you have to pay bills every month and they see those bills with the words “Past Due.” They also notice when you avoid the bill collectors that call day and night. And rest assured that they pay attention to the comments you make about the bill collectors and the financial bind you may be facing. What are your actions and comments teaching them?  Start doing your best to pay your bills on time and avoid the late fees. You’ll be setting a great example for your child and giving him a wonderful financial management heritage.
  3. Start teaching them that making great financial strides requires sacrifice. Let your children know that you’re not buying a new car because it’s more important to save for their college or retirement. Give them the option of making a small purchase at the sacrifice of something else. All financial decisions have positive and negative consequences.
  4. Start showing them the rewards of financial responsibility. No one wants to sacrifice all the time. The whole point of sacrificing is to enjoy the end result. Show your children that regularly saving money results in a vacation or a new television. Let your kids see and experience the positive outcome of good financial habits. My niece is saving towards her own vacation shopping funds.  She wants to buy a new cell phone and new clothes.  She’s already made her shopping list, and is eagerly looking forward to enjoying the rewards of her own financial responsibility. …getting everything on her list that she worked so hard and saved up for. 

Are you demonstrating good financial management habits to your children? Are you demonstrating poor habits?

You have a tremendous amount of influence over your child’s financial future. They’re likely to behave in a fashion similar to what they see in you.

Consider what you’re teaching your child each day with your money management habits.

If it’s not good, now is the time to change it and improve your money management skills.  If it’s good.  Congratulations.  You are raising future adults who will have good financial management habits!

Please Share Your Thoughts 

 In the comments below, share with us:

1. What steps are you taking to teach your children financial responsibility?
2. Do you have any tips to share that have worked well in your family?

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All content on this ​website was created and/or compiled by ​Natural Stress Relief Women. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material (including text and images) without express and written permission from this ​site’s author/owner is strictly prohibited.

What To Do When Your Ex Finds A New Girlfriend

Read on to find out what to do when your ex finds a new girlfriend.

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One of the most difficult milestones in dealing with a past relationship is the day your ex finds a new girlfriend.  Do you remember what that day was like for you?  It may have been like that line in the Godfather III movie. Just when you think you’re over it, your emotions pull you back in and the emotional roller coaster starts all over again.

The anger, resentment, regret, hurt, feelings of despair….did I mention ANGER?  All these negative feelings may attack you at the same time when you find out that your ex is seeing someone else.

Here is the GOOD news!

You can turn things around by shaking free of the past and preparing yourself for new connections …whenever they may come.

Use these practical steps to avoid relationship stress and  help yourself and your children ( if any) adjust to the changes and new people that may come into your relationships after a break-up.

Steps You Need to Take for Yourself

  1. Come to terms with your feelings.  Don’t try to be perfect, and don’t ignore your true feelings. It’s natural to go through a stage of jealousy or bitterness. There is a huge difference between having those negative feelings and actually acting on them.  Make that distinction!  For now, just know that you are in control of your feelings and you can make your discomfort dissolve in time by training your mind to be peaceful.  
  2. Resist comparisons. Maybe the new girlfriend is prettier, smarter, richer, younger, or thinner than you. Maybe she won an Olympic gold medal in ice skating or she published a best seller. Don’t do that to yourself, resist comparing yourself with her. It’s much more productive to  focus on investing in your own self improvement and personal development and on becoming a more balanced, beautiful, happy, and stress-resilient person from the inside out! 
  3. Readjust your attention.  Don’t use technology and mutual friends to collect information about the new couple. That’s is an exercise in futility that will only leave you feeling more anger and hostility.  Those negative pursuits benefit no one.  Instead redirect your efforts to more constructive activities. 
  4. Get support. This is NOT the time to isolate yourself and throw a pity party.  Instead, surround yourself with family and friends who  will encourage you and support you through difficult times. If necessary talk with a counselor who specializes in relationships, invest in our 7 day diy program to help you cope with the stress, or secure the help of a stress management mentor. 
  5. Restore trust In Others. If you are like me, once trust has been broken in a relationship, it may be hard trust again. Your bad  experiences with your ex may have affected your ability to trust others. Don’t rush into any new romantic relationships just because your ex has a new girlfriend. Take baby steps to build up your comfort levels with trusting people again in general. Chat with a new neighbor. Invite a friend to attend the opera with you if you usually went with your ex. 
  6.  Go out on a date. It may take time to make a lasting connection, but there is no reason you cannot enjoy a pleasant evening out right now.  Just make sure your date knows there you are not looking for a lasting connection and there are no romantic strings attached.  Once that is clear, it may be fine to meet someone for coffee.  Start of with dates during the day (e.e. breakfast dates, lunch dates) and avoid going on dates at night, when the presumption of  romance may be more prevalent.
  7. Start a new project. Throw yourself into a new adventure. Sign up for scuba diving classes or plan a vacation to the Caribbean to have fun in the sun and get your groove back.  

Steps You Need to Take with Your Children

  1. Explain the situation.  Don’t create too much drama for your kids when your ex finds a new girlfriend.  Your ex may marry the first woman he meets or he may date around for years. Protect your children from the roller coaster ride of new girlfriends coming and going.  Wait until your ex announces his engagement to think about how his new girlfriend will adapt to being a new stepparent. 
  2. Be Clear On the boundaries. If communications with your ex and his new partner tend to backfire, restrict your interactions to essentials.  Communicate and coordinate with your ex on matters like child care and dental appointments, but keep your private life to yourself and stay out of his private life with his new partner as well. Your kids will be the biggest beneficiaries when you maintain a calm relationship with your ex for their sakes.
  3. Set Priorities issues. When relationships end there are a million changes to deal with, especially when kids are involved. You cannot do them all at once, so learn to concentrate on the major concerns.  Make sure that your children are physically and emotionally safe and observing basic etiquette.  
  4. Respect different household rules. You and your ex may have completely different rules when it comes to how you run your households. You may be stricter and more organized and his household may be a free for all. Instead of allowing this frustrate you or getting entangles in heated arguments with your ex, try providing as much consistency as possible at your household and be tolerant about personal preferences and differences, as long as those differences are not putting the wellbeing of your kids at risk.  
  5. Show compassion. Take into account that the three of you and your children are facing an unfamiliar situation. Respect each person’s opinions and empathize with their struggles.  Focus on the fact that you are doing this for your children.  Their happiness and wellbeing must be the top priority, and getting along with you ex and his new girlfriend will need to be at the top of your list.
  6. Spend one-on-one time. Your children may need extra love and attention when your ex brings a new partner into the home. Plan separate activities with each child so you have the opportunity to answer their questions and talk on a deeper level. Be positive and cheerful. Ask their teachers and other adults to inform you about any changes they notice.  
  7. Communicate directly. Talk to your ex and their new partner instead of relaying messages through your children. Protecting your kids is worth any inconvenience.

You can find peace and still extend your good wishes to your ex and their new partner. Be honest about your feelings and make smart choices that create greater love and fulfillment in your own life.

Please Share Your Thoughts 

In the comments below, share with us:

1. What have you done to cope with moving on after a breakup?
2. Which one of the points above will help you the most when your ex finds a new girlfriend?

 

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All content on this ​website was created and/or compiled by ​Natural Stress Relief Women. Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material (including text and images) without express and written permission from this ​site’s author/owner is strictly prohibited.